I'm beginning to doubt even my own purpose every now and then. Since I left band early today for tuition I've been thinking to myself :

Am I going for band just to see my friends, or am I there to help bring up my section, to guide and to teach?

This is indeed a very interesting question, because, truthfully, I'm unable to answer it myself. I'm starting to think that I'm contributing nothing to the band in terms of music and marching proficiency. I'm just a nobody standing by and watching, even though sometimes I step in and take charge, it always comes to nothing.

Is it that I've been so used to working with smart people; people who are fast, take initiative, go with the flow, never break the balance of music and tempo, that I've grown lazy to teach and guide who aren't?

What have I become?